Peter Travers: 'Rolling Stone' movie critic and supreme sexist asshole

I like romantic movies so I was pretty excited to see "The Time Traveler's Wife." I read some pretty bad reviews, so I wasn't expecting much. That said, I did see the movie and I didn't really like it. I won't bother watching it again, even if it's on TV for free.

Anyway, one of the reviews I read was written by Peter Travers, from Rolling Stone magazine. His review is offensive and annoying throughout. He begins by claiming "the movie is Kryptonite for guys" because it's a love story. So, a love story is lethal for men? Oh yeah... only women can be emotional about love and relationships. Men are hard and tough. They can't like that girly crap. That would make them a gay pussy wimp. Men can't watch movies about feelings, it will kill them.

Next, he writes, "And after each trip he [Henry, the time traveler] ends up freezing his cojones in some alley but always gym-toned naked. The porn industry might have treated this premise with more blunt honesty." I'm currently rolling my eyes. One of the rare times a semi-nude, good looking man gets thrown in a movie, it's resented. And the semi-nude scenes (where no goods were even shown) served a purpose in a movie. Only he time travels, not his clothes. That makes sense. (And it was mentioned that the character had to stay in shape to outrun the law and fight for survival.) Excuse Eric Bana for being in shape. Perhaps they should have cast a fat guy to play the role, just so men wouldn't be threatened. It wouldn't have made sense for the movie, but it would have made out of shape men more comfortable I guess.

Also, only male nudity bothers him. I didn't see one single complaint about the Rachael McAdams naked butt scene. Or, what about every single, unrealistic, topless sex kitten thrown into almost every mainstream movie? That doesn't seem to bother him. Gym-toned naked women are ok, even if the nudity serves no purpose in the movie, other than for guys to get off.

But, here's the real kicker. He actually wrote:

"When Clare and Henry marry she makes a pretty fuss about how he keeps missing birthdays and holidays and how she cooked such a nice dinner and all. Sheesh, do men really need to pay for a movie about guilt trips they can get for free at home? For the same effect, dive nude into a tub of molten marshmallow."

This REALLY pisses me off for a few reasons. One being that he plays on the "nagging wife" stereotype. Men get bitched at at home from their bitchy wives. Women are just nagging bitches. It never seizes to amaze me how routine it is for people to belittle and demean an entire gender. Here is Peter Travers, a white male, perpetuating stereotypes to keep the oppressed down. Men just keep taunting the female gender with labels like this. Claiming we have hormonal problems and laughing about "that time of the month." Well, smart asses, a woman's hormones right before and during her menstrual cycle are at that time the most like a man's hormones. So the way that women act during "that time of the month" is how men always act. These "nagging wife" labels are just another way to make women seem more annoying then men, less rational then men, more emotional then men, etc. So basically, just another way to make women seem inferior to men. And the worst part is, oppressed groups often internalize blame and believe such lies. It's so screwed up.

A smaller annoyance is just the assumption that the man is paying for his movie ticket. I happen to know a lot of dead beats out their who mooch off of women. Movie tickets included. And I know a lot of couples and friends that go Dutch. Or women that take men out on dates. We're not in the '50s, and it shouldn't be assumed that men pay for everything. Asshole.

Lastly, Travers dares to call this a "movie about guilt trips." Out of the entire 1 hour 48 minutes, there is approximately 1-2 minutes of the woman giving the man a 'guilt trip' about missing holidays and dinners. And it's called venting. It's a normal, human process. The woman is rightfully hurt and upset, and vents for 1-2 minutes total. Now suddenly that's what the movie is about? Forget the idea of love or time travel. It's about guilt trips and nagging bitches. Those 2 minutes of dialogue really transformed the entire movie into a bitchfest.

Oh yeah, and I am annoyed that he uses the term "pretty fuss" to describe the woman's 'guilt trip.' What is a "pretty fuss" anyway? Sounds like a way to belittle a woman's rightful emotions and justify ignoring a woman's feelings. The dainty little damsel was making a pretty fuss. She was whining like a little girl and throwing a tantrum. It's just become so commonplace to shrug off a woman's feelings and pretend she doesn't have anything legitimate to say or think or feel, just because she's a woman.

Here's the full review (warning, the entire thing is crap):

http://www.rollingstone.com/reviews/movie/18264780/review/29647925/the_time_travelers_wife

What would a matriarchal society look like?

What if we lived in an opposite society, where everything was backwards and matriarchy ruled? Gender roles would be switched, and women would have the upper hand...

First, men would labor endlessly to look good for women. Their devotion to physical attractiveness would know no ends. Men would work out incessantly so their bodies would be tight and toned. They would spend hundreds of dollars a month on beauty supplies that keep them looking gorgeous and young. Then they would wake up early every morning to apply their beauty products to impress women, and of course, other men. They would spend a few hundred dollars getting their hair cut and colored every 6 weeks also. No amount of time or money spent on beauty would be considered too much.

And on the flip side, women would roll out of bed, take a shower, and be ready to go in about 10 minutes total time. And this would be normal. Nobody would think we looked like slobs, because showering would be the only real prerequisite for looking good. Granted, we would have to throw some clothes on, but that would be the extent of our "getting ready."

Then us women would go to our high paying jobs, where men worked below us, or beside us but for less money. We would demean these men by calling them "sweetie" or "honey" in the workplace. But of course, we would respect our fellow female workers, whom we would refer to by their names. We would also watch these men compete with one another in a caddy way. They would be conditioned to battle for female approval. Men would talk bad about each other and belittle one another about things such as weight and attractiveness. "He's gotten so fat." "Did you see him without any make up on? So gross!" "He really needs to whiten his teeth."

We would come home from work and watch our husbands clean the house, make dinner, and take care of the children. We would likely retreat to our "woman cave" or "woman den," which would be a designated area of the house that excluded men. This is where we would go to relax with our friends, and talk about men as if they are objects instead of people.

We women would be in our "woman cave" and watch general comedies. Or any movie for that matter. Because most movies would have very attractive men, with very little clothing. We would see huge, erect penises all the time, and for no reason. It wouldn't be to further a movie plot, but just thrown in there to sexually amuse women. No matter what movie we decided on, you could bet there would be some great eye candy. But that would make sense, because that would be a man's purpose- to look good for us and be our own personal sex toys.

As women, we'd go out with our female friends to speedo contests or wet brief contests. We'd see men walking around a stage in small amounts of clothing, showing us why they deserve our attention. Most of these men would have had "male enhancement" surgery too. Because natural penis size is not good enough. We would want our men unnaturally super sized. Enduring surgery and paying thousands of dollars for physical beauty isn't asking too much. Men would like doing it, right? It would give them the confidence to compete in those wet brief contests, where we would hose down men and judge them on who had the bigger package.

The world would even watch men compete in beauty pagents. We would toss some college money their way, but they would have to look good to earn it. I can see it now- men parading around a stage in barely anything, so we could judge their bodies on a scale of 1-10. We'd also judge them on how handsome they looked in a tux, and maybe a few other things so the contest wouldn't be completely demeaning. But remember, no unattractive man could compete in the first place, and in the end, it's all about looks. That's who deserves scholarship money- the best looking man. A man's most valuable assett is his looks, and we musn't forget it.

I might even drive through a coffee stand, where I am served my espresso by a young man in speedos. And I will go get some chicken wings served to me by men with their penises hanging out of their underwear. And I'd go get my haircut at a place where men wear super sexy outfits to sexually arouse me. I might even get my house cleaned by bottomless male house cleaners. The bigger the penis, the bigger the tip. Ahh...how great to have men going to any possible length to please women. Society has taught them their role, and they obey it. No questions asked.

Women would be expected to sleep with many men. That's what men would be there for- our sexual pleasure and not much else. Men, on the other hand, would be ridiculed and ostracized by society for sleeping with too many women. These men would have horrible reputations, have lies spread about them, and be an outcast. They would endure the pressure to be sexy, but not actually be sexual.

Now, as women, we might even want to tap into the prostitution market. Why not pay for sex? Again, that's what men would be there for- our sexual pleasure. This way we could just use a man very quickly for our sexual gratification, and be done with him. Boys, of course, would be very high in demand. A woman would have to pay top dollar for a 12 year old. Would it bother us that most of these boys and men are sex slaves? No. Would it bother us that women found vulnerable young boys, told them they were our boyfriends, and then days later, forced them into prostitution? Would we care that these boys and men are being held against their will, beaten, and forced to have sex with us? Not really. We don't want to know any of the sticky details, like sexual slavery, drug addiction, and prior childhood sexual abuse. We just want to get laid.

In fact, brothels around the world would serve women. We would have boys and men standing behind glass windows, as we looked and picked which one we wanted to rape. After all, they would just be males. An inferior gender. Good for nothing but sex.

Politics would be reserved for women. If a man tried to run for office, ha! We would all scoff and laugh about how he's not equipped for politics because he is a man. Men are just too aggressive and violent by nature to be in control of anything. They don't deserve representation. So when they do run, we will judge them on their looks and wardrobe instead of their qualifications. No one will take a male candidate seriously. I mean, he'd be a man. He should be focused on his family life and clothing. He wouldn't have time to be in charge. And if was a strong, outspoken man...watch out. He would be the asshole of the century. We'd expect our men to be soft spoken and demure. Anything else would be too much like a woman. And we like our gender roles. Men are pansies and women are strong and in charge. Nothing else would make sense.

To top things off, we would give men self-esteem issues from as early an age as possible. He would see nothing on TV but thin, buff men. Anorexia and steroid abuse would be sky high for young boys. Every media outlet would be shoving beauty images down their throat, which would serve as training manuals for how men should look. Weight watchers would be targeted at men only, because being "hot" after 40 would be a man's main priority. Lookin' good-what else would there be? Add Botox, tummy tucks, liposuction and various implants in there too. Men will need those tools to keep up their image.

This could go on and on, but it isn't necessary. This matriarchal world is fucked up. It's degrading and dehumanizing to an entire gender. This pretend world is just like the world we live in now, except women are the ones being dehumanized.